Sticks and Stones...

Anyone who gets to know me finds out pretty quick that I'm the type of guy that will joke about anything. I've gotten myself into trouble a few times for saying something about someone who'd passed away or joking about something that was apparently taboo. I've always felt that anything that can be laughed at can be survived and life's more fun when you can make fun of everything around you. This means that if you are one of my close friends then chances are we've talked a lot of trash about everything from each others mothers to eating habits.

Amazing as it may seem though, I do have some boundaries. I was talking today about how, I've never felt right joking with the women in my life about their appearance or intelligence. That's right I have no problem teasing my wife about her mother being dead, but in nine years of marriage I've never jokingly called her stupid or teased her about anything in regards to her physical appearance. When the couples I marry ask for my advice on marriage I tell them to be careful what you say when you joke or fight, because words can do more damage to people than actions.

So why only women? Good question. Words hurt men as well, God knows there have been times in my life when I've carried around what someone has said about me way too long, but I think it's a little different with women. Now, I don't claim to know anything about women, I'm not that chivalrous or romantic and I'm sure I say the wrong things a lot, but after twenty-eight years of living, working, being married to, and friends with women I've noticed one thing. Little comments, even said jokingly, tend to pop up in their minds later to cause them doubt far more often than it does with men.

I know some of you might think I'm making too big of a deal about this and that's fine. This is my conviction and I don't expect it to be anyone else's. If this means that the girls in my life get to take a few more jabs at me with out me retorting back then the men do, then fine, but it's a small price to pay to keep them feeling good about themselves. Now, as for the rest of the stuff about women, I'm still trying to figure that out.