Never

I admit it, I'm bored. So here we go, ten things I never want to see at The Venue:

1. Tambourines - As far as musical instruments goes this one ranks somewhere above the kazoo and below the cowbell for me.

2. Choir Robes - Choirs aren't our style to begin with, but I'll admit that there are a couple good ones out there, however I don't know how putting on a mumu helps you sing any better.

3. Pews - We would never think of putting such a horribly uncomfortable piece of furniture in our own houses but we somehow think that God wants it in His.

4. Overuse of Spiritual Jargon (aka Christianese) - I think a lot more people would give their lives to Jesus if they could understand what we were saying half the time.

5. Name Badges - I know some churches love these, but for me there is never a good reason for a stranger to stick something on my shirt.

6. Forced Physical Affection - The only two places in America where you will be told to hold a stranger's hand is a preschool or a church. I've noticed that since becoming a Christian I hug people I hardly know more than the people I love the most.

7. A Lack of Concern for the Lost and Hurting - Many churches spend more time and money on leadership development than outreach. Maybe we'd have less trouble getting people to follow us if we were actually going somewhere.

8. Alligators - They might be part of God's creation, but they scare me and there's no place for them here.

9. A Decoration Committee - Or half the other committees that spring up around churches unchecked. If it takes a team of people gathering on a weekly basis to decide how many fake plants should go around your sanctuary then you have some serious issues. The people who have the kind of time on their hands to be on these committees are usually not the people you want making decisions for your church anyways.

10. The Word "Ministry" After Every Job in the Church - I will ever be amazed by the number of churches seem to feel that a job is not important before God unless we put the word ministry after it. I've seen the custodial ministry, the tape/CD ministry, the parking lot ministry, the refreshments ministry, etc. Why can't we just say, "I'm the guy who cleans the floors and this is the lady who makes the coffee." Does it make unclogging the toilet any less important if we forget to add an extra word to it?