Dr. No!

Being with Autumn in the hospital when she was having Ethan made me think about how long it's been since I've been to the doctor for anything. My last check-up was ten years ago, I was forced to get one for a job I was applying for or else I wouldn't have even done that one. I have nothing against doctors, it's just I don't get sick very often and the idea of regular check ups kinda freaks me out. I'll probably go some day soon, but I was thinking about worse case scenarios and this is what I came up with:

Here are the ten things I never want to hear the doctor say to me while I'm being examined:

1. "You look like someone I knew in community college."
2. "That's not suppose to look like that."
3. "Hmmm..."
4. "I'll be back, I need to get the lubrication."
5. "Could you look at this for me and tell me if you think it looks normal?"
6. "Here's a number to a nice funeral home."
7. "After you fill up that one could you fill this one for me? I have a court ordered drug test in an hour."
8. "That's not suppose to be that color."
9. "I'm not going to lie to you, things are going to get a little weird for a few minutes."
10. "Bad news, we're out of lubrication."